


arm your fears like soldiers (and slay them)

by BoyishStutter



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-21 09:06:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9540902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BoyishStutter/pseuds/BoyishStutter
Summary: Bruce likes to be prepared. Hal understands.





	

**Author's Note:**

> "Hal Jordan – he’s the anti-Batman. Batman has everything mapped out seven ways, while Hal will jump off a cliff and figure out how not to die on his way down." - Kurt Busiek
> 
> I imagine Bruce updating his living will and actual will every two weeks; to account for new science, to add new organizations and people he's met to become recipients of portions of his wealth up on his death, etc. It'd seem that he'd take his emergency contact just as seriously.

Bruce likes to be prepared. It’s a way to cope with the anxiety, the panic, the crushing fear that he is going to lose everything and everyone he’s cared about. He doesn’t think he does a very good job of it, but still. He makes the effort.

That’s why they’re here. That’s why instead of spending a lazy Sunday afternoon slowly grinding against Hal on the couch, he’s wearing his reading glasses and holding a legal document at least thirty pages long.

He has Hal’s feet in his lap, running his hand over the man’s ankle absentmindedly, as he reads aloud, “In the case of a medically induced coma lasting longer than forty-five days without significant change in vitals and no --”

“Babe.”

Bruce pauses, turning his head to look at his fiance. The engagement is recent, though Hal’s class ring sitting on his finger is already becoming a familiar weight.

“Hm?”

Hal looks uncomfortable, his foot jiggling against Bruce’s hold.

“Is this really necessary? Right now?”

Bruce tilts his head, attempting to discern where Hal’s discomfort stems from.

“What do you mean?”

Of course it’s necessary. Most of what he does is necessary.

“It’s...a little morbid. When you asked if I wanted to be listed as your emergency contact, I didn’t realize it would involve…”

Hal trails off, gesturing between them.

“Ah.”

Hal sighs, “I love you. It’s just, a living will? There’s over a dozen pages, _two dozen_ , actually! And it’s all in brutally efficient legal jargon...and then you want to go over your _actual will_?”

Bruce removes his reading glasses. He doesn’t think they’ll be focusing on either document any time soon.

“Can’t I just read it then? Cross that bridge when we get to it?”

 _Oh_.

He understands now. Hal doesn’t want to think ahead; doesn’t want to think of Bruce bloody, mangled, needing someone else to make the decisions. Hal doesn’t want to acknowledge the very real possibility that he could die. At any time, on any mission. Hell, he could be killed while being nowhere near active duty. Life is fragile, a fact he knows all too well, which is why he _has_ to do this. He has to be prepared, even for the futures he doesn’t want.

“Hal…”

Bruce squeezes the man’s ankle, wishing he could offer some form of reassurance. But, he doesn’t know what to say. He has to face the realities of his life, of their lives; he doesn’t know how to be any other way.

“No, we can’t. This is what it entails.”

He’s not sure what he means. That it’s what’s necessary for Hal to be his emergency contact, or if it’s what’s necessary for Hal to be his husband. He doesn’t want to examine it too closely, either. He doesn’t want to make this an ultimatum.

“I need to be sure you understand what I mean, what I want. I need you to be prepared for any and all eventualities. I need to be able to trust that you’ll make the decisions I would if I was unable to do so.”

Bruce keeps his expression even, though he feels tense and unsure. His tendencies to go overboard with his desire to be prepared are not new by any stretch of the imagination, but he still feels self-conscious about it now. Hal knows him, knows every part of him, including this one, and yet - the fear still manages to work its way into his mind that eventually there will be a moment where his eccentricities will be too much for Hal. That the man will finally realize how truly damaged he is and decide to cut his losses.

He swallows, his throat inexplicably dry, “If you don’t want to continue, that’s fine. Clark and Alfred can remain listed as my emergency contacts. They’ve both already been through this.”

It’s a suitable compromise. Bruce doesn’t know why he feels his insides twisting at the premise.

Hal shakes his head, “No. I want to do this. I get it, okay? I don’t like to think about you being hurt...or worse. But, this is important to you. I want to be your husband and this is a part of that.”

A grin spreads across his face, “So, put your sexy glasses back on and return to line 34b or whatever, ‘in the case of a medically induced coma…’”

Bruce complies, feeling relieved, an answering smile spreading across his face, “In the case of a medically induced coma lasting longer than forty-five days without significant change in vitals and…”

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to Khat and Esther who have both talked with me about this particular scenario and who give me the confidence to keep posting my writing. <3
> 
> Title from "All I Ever Wanted" by the Airborne Toxic Event.


End file.
